What am I talking about?
What else could I be talking about!
The Hyundai Veloster
Where in the hell did they come up with such a ridiculous name. Really? “Velocity” + “Roadster”? You might as well call it a Trypdick or an Orasity, get it? “Orange” + “Monstrosity”.
Why 3 doors? Because you can bring your other whore along too, that’s right! You know why… Is that really supposed to sell it? Are all the guys watching going to go, “Hey! If I buy a Hyundai Veloster I can have 2 bimbos instead of 0! I better go pick one up RIGHT NOW!”. Yeah…I don’t think so. Was this really the best marketing ploy they could come up with?
Who in their right mind would think rolling up to a club (or anywhere for that matter) in a brightly colored Veloster would be a good idea? Really? If it were me, I’d park it 6 blocks away and lie that my driver had taken my Rolls Royce to be parked. Or say that that Ferrari parked outside the club was mine. ANYTHING for God’s sake. Do you really want the type of girls that would get in a Veloster to get into YOUR car? No thank you.
What in the world is wrong with having 4 doors?
Do these designers not understand that the human brain is programmed to see symmetry as beauty?
Being unique and “out there” is one thing but they could have gone about it different ways.
I think the Dutch made a better Veloster commercial. It didn’t SELL the car but it did make for a very entertaining commercial.
Maybe they can hire me to sell their cars. I bet I could come up with a more realistic and memorable way to sell the Veloster. I’d have to do some research but I think I could do it.
THIS is supposed to be a part of Hyundai’s “Premium Youth Lab”? Is this really what young people of today want to drive around? Maybe I should just shoot myself now and get it over with. What happened to classic cars, cars kids can race and tune up, cars kids dream about growing up, cars kids watch in super hero movies, cars that kids see celebrities driving or even their parents or someone they look up to. This America, is not that car. I don’t care if it has a greenhouse effect or an all glass hatchback roof. This car is just a disappointment to all children and adults that crave that new ingenuity of up and coming designers. You’re not even close Hyundai…not even.